A Body of Her Own presents absorbing monologues by women of various ages, localities, and levels of society. With remarkable openness and sensitivity, the women tell of their most intimate parts of their lives. They speak of difficulties, lies, excitement, shame, sanctity, and the discomfort.
The book brings to light the personal and unique perspective of different women’s relationships with their bodies, its connection with their womanhood, and the effect the ritual of the Mikveh has on their lives.
The book ‘Each to Her Own Body – Tales of Immersion’ by Dr. Ella Kenner, published by Pardes Publishing House, is a groundbreaking work that presents, for the first time, women’s sensitive perspectives on their bodies. The book comprises a collection of approximately 29 captivating monologues from women who share, with candor and authenticity, their most intimate experiences surrounding the Jewish laws of ritual purity. They speak of the difficulties, the lies, the excitement, the shame, the embarrassment, and the sanctity that unfold behind closed doors.
‘Each to Her Own Body’ includes a special chapter dedicated to terms associated with ritual purity laws and sexuality, such as: ‘Turning the Table’ – a euphemism for anal intercourse; ‘D’oraita/Mid’oraita’ – concerning the laws of menstrual impurity and purification; ‘Shmirat Negiah’ – expressing the prohibition of affectionate physical contact between men and women; ‘Whether Raw or Cooked’ – referring to a husband’s desires towards his wife; ‘Niddah Wedding’ – a term for ceremonies conducted while the bride is in a state of ritual impurity; and various other concepts.
The monologues present perspectives from diverse women of different backgrounds, ages, and worlds, including: Rivka, who comes from an ultra-secular-atheistic family; Naama, a religious feminist aware of the contradictions in her life; Elisheva, a Jerusalemite raised in the National Religious community; Rachel, a bride instructor; Chava, an Ethiopian-born woman married to a Keis’s son; and Avigail, a secular woman living with a consciousness of tradition rather than religion.
“I told the bride instructor that I wanted to understand the law. To understand what to do. That she shouldn’t talk to me about spiritual matters. It was a good instruction except for one sentence that affected me for years. She said that a man’s physical needs are a woman’s spiritual needs. What a man wants, a woman must work on her spirituality to accept it. Meaning, if he wants something from me that I don’t like, I’m supposed to do it. I carried this burden for years until I learned to say no. My mother didn’t go to the mikveh, and I knew this. She wasn’t very religious either. She came from a secular home, and there were things she took upon herself for the children’s education. In my place of residence during those years, this wasn’t unusual. In my mother’s generation and among her friends, I doubt if anyone went to the mikveh. It wasn’t religiously customary, just as most didn’t cover their heads. I was exposed to the mikveh in high school. I studied five units of Jewish Oral Law and one unit of marriage and family purity. We asked embarrassing questions, and the male teacher was busy blushing. The next time was when I went with a secular friend who didn’t want the mikveh attendant to immerse her, so I did it. The attendant was impressed with how I knew how to perform the immersion. Before my wedding, I realized I wanted to go to the mikveh. I have a friend whose sister-in-law has a private mikveh. It was a pleasant and enjoyable experience…”
